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I was diagnosed last year febuary 11 with stage 1b1 after having a radical hysterectomy and nodes removed iv been given the all clear so far with usual 5yr follow ups my problem is tho that now its kinda only just sinking in what's happened im feeling robbed of everything have huge regrets about how i chose to do things , im 32 no children wanted them so badly but after 1 miscarriage and never falling pregnant again this happens im really struggling to come to terms with things and im angry 90% of the time , im sick of hearing you can adopt or use a surrogate like its as easy has saying it i don't feel that people understand and feel that the majority are thinking im un-grateful cause iv been lucky to beat it iv had ppl say "your one of the lucky ones " and of course i get what they mean but i don't feel that way how can anyone that's been through this be lucky you hear so much about cancer and the usual im so lucky from survivors so why can't i feel the same i wish i had a switch to turn off my feelings and emotions i hate feeling the way i do cause in my head i keep thinking the cancers gone but its still effecting me is this normal 18 months in ? Will i awake one morning and all these thoughts be gone ? Will i appreciate what life can give without children ? Will i just live for the day and not worry about the future? Can anyone relate ? X