How to Help Someone with a Gambling Addiction

Last modified: 2 July 2025, 22:56

Imagine you bet on your favorite sports event, for example, the Royal Ascot. You enjoy occasional betting on various horse races. For you, it can be harmless because you don’t have a desire to make money from it. 

It may be harmless for your neighbor, John, who enjoys playing slots on his phone. It can be harmless for your sister, Joice, who likes to play poker with her friends and at the land-based casino every month. 

However, for your uncle Jim’s situation, it may be different for various reasons. He sees that Joice is playing, making fun, and even earning some money. And here is where Jim’s addiction can play a part. Harboring feelings of instant wealth from the basic card game. And there the danger begins.

So today I’d like to tell you more about gambling addiction. Why do we even start to fill the emptiness and sorrow with basically fun activities? How the hormone system works and how to avoid or get help in this matter.

When Gambling Turns Into Problem Gambling

Problem gambling doesn’t always look like it does in the movies. It can wear a polite smile, keep up appearances, and tell stories that sound believable. But beneath that surface, it creates cracks that widen over time. People start borrowing money without explanation, buying new clothes while secretly falling into debt, or choosing to gamble instead of spending time with family.

Friends and partners begin to feel the impact first. They find themselves stressed or confused, trying to make sense of someone else’s gambling habits. “They’re just blowing off steam,” one might think—until the bills pile up, or the talk of quitting turns into another broken promise.

Gambling addiction is not a moral failing or lack of discipline. It’s a recognised behavioural condition that often follows patterns similar to substance addictions. And when these patterns go unnoticed or unaddressed, they can affect every area of life: work, relationships, finances, even mental health.

Spotting the Signs of Gambling Addiction

Here are some common signs that might indicate someone is experiencing harm from gambling:

• Secrecy and denial: Hiding receipts, lying about losses, or avoiding questions about time and money spent.
• Financial trouble: Unpaid bills, unexpected loans, or borrowing from friends and family.
• Changes in behaviour: Mood swings and sudden stress.
• Not doing your tasks: Missing work, skipping meals, or ignoring family obligations.
• Chasing losses: Trying to win back money with more gambling.

How Gambling Harm Affects Family and Friends

When someone starts gambling, they rarely consider the ripple effect it might have on their loved ones. Yet gambling-related harm doesn’t stay in isolation. It spreads into households, friendships, and communities, leaving behind emotional and financial damage.

For families, the impact can be devastating. A partner might notice gaps in the budget or missing cash, only to discover later that the money went to gambling. Conversations around family finances can become dishonest. Promises to stop gambling are often made in the heat of guilt, but broken when the need to gamble resurfaces. It’s not always about winning. It’s about chasing a feeling, an escape, or a desperate attempt to fix earlier losses.

Children are often the ones most quietly affected. They may not understand what’s happening, but they feel the tension. Missed meals, unpaid bills, absent parents, or sudden mood changes are all serious signs. They leave emotional scars that last a long time. A child might overhear arguments or be left alone for longer periods as a parent struggles to deal with the fallout.

Friends also end up in a hard situation. They lend money to help, not realising it’s being used for gambling. They might feel the growing emotional distance, the excuses for not showing up, or the denial that something’s wrong. Helping someone with gambling problems is hard to balance between support and harm.

As the risks grow, trust breaks down, and relationships suffer. People around the gambler are forced to deal with the consequences of decisions they never made.

Gambling Addiction and Human Biology

Let’s talk a bit about biology and why some people find it harder to walk away from a slot machine or betting app. You might know someone who enjoys an occasional flutter and feels fine, win or lose. But for others, there’s something different going on beneath the surface.

Picture this: Each time you place a bet or win, your brain releases chemicals like dopamine. It’s the same feel-good hormone that gives you a little high when you eat your favourite cake or get a compliment at work. For some, that hit of dopamine can be surprisingly strong, and the brain starts to chase it, almost like it’s after a reward.

Now, when gambling becomes a habit, those hormone rushes don’t just stay level. You get ups and downs—like a rollercoaster. Some people with gambling addiction experience real mood swings: bursts of excitement and hope, then sudden dips into anxiety or irritability. It’s not just in their heads; it’s their biology at work.

And here’s the tricky part. Over time, the brain can get used to these highs, needing more bets or bigger risks just to feel the same spark. That’s when the cycle of addiction can really take hold, making it harder to step back and find that balance again.

So if you notice these sharp changes in mood or a craving to keep playing even when you know it’s risky, remember—it’s not just a lack of willpower. There’s a biological reason why gambling can feel so hard to quit, and it’s okay to ask for help.

Supporting a Family Member With a Gambling Problem

Watching a loved one struggle with gambling can be painful and emotionally draining. You might feel helpless and unsure whether to confront them, protect them, or just walk away. But supporting a family member with a gambling problem is possible. It can make a real difference.

The first step is to acknowledge the problem without blame. Gambling is often linked to stress, depression, even trauma. When people gamble compulsively, it’s not just about winning or losing money. It’s about losing control. The behaviour becomes a way to escape or cope, not just a form of entertainment.

If you want to help, start by creating a safe space for open conversation. Let them talk about their feelings without fear of judgement. Listen more than you speak. Ask gentle questions. You might say, “I’ve noticed you’ve been struggling lately. Do you want to talk about it?”

Avoid taking over or trying to “fix” everything. Instead, encourage them to seek professional help. Support groups, therapy, and helplines offer tools that can lead to recovery. Make sure they know it’s okay to ask for help.

Do not forget to set boundaries. Don’t lend large sums of money or cover debts. Instead, help them manage their finances responsibly, or suggest speaking to a debt adviser. Protect your own finances.

It’s just as important to look after yourself. Supporting someone with a gambling problem is emotionally exhausting. Give yourself permission to take breaks. Talk to others. Connect with support groups for families. You deserve to feel emotionally free, even while helping someone else.

In the end, remember this: you didn’t cause the problem, and you can’t control it. But with patience, and the right boundaries, you can be a part of the solution.

Supporting a Friend With a Gambling Problem

Your friend may feel ashamed or try to hide the problem. But your support could be the most important step to help your friend take toward recovery.

When you’re ready to talk, choose a private and calm moment. Speak with care. Let them know you’re concerned, not judging. You might say something like, “I’ve noticed a few things that worry me. Do you want to talk about it?” It’s important to be honest, but also gentle. The goal is to support, not pressure.

Try not to give too much advice unless they ask for it. Listen instead. People with gambling problems often feel alone, so being heard can really help. And remember, you don’t have to have all the answers. You’re not there to fix the person, but to stand beside them as they try to fix their situation.

Offer practical help, but avoid taking over. You can suggest they seek professional treatment or contact a support group. Help them look into options and offer to go with them if they’re nervous.

Using Self-Exclusion Tools to Break the Cycle (Advice for Gamblers)

For someone struggling with gambling, breaking the cycle is about having the right tools and support in place. One of the most effective first steps a gambler can take is using self-exclusion tools. These tools are designed to reduce temptation and create a safer space to begin recovery.

Self-exclusion allows individuals to block access to gambling websites and venues for a set period. It’s not a cure, but it creates essential distance between the gambler and their urges. During this time, they can focus on healing and rebuilding trust with those around them.

Some tools work at the account level, preventing access to gambling apps or websites. Others involve blocking gambling transactions directly through bank accounts. For someone caught in the loop of constant gambling, even small barriers can make a big difference.

It’s good to make a plan when using these tools. Think about what to do during moments of temptation. Who can you call? What can you focus on instead? Make a list of other things to do—walking, reading, or working out. Alternative habits help retrain the brain and reduce the emotional pull of gambling.

It’s also important to remain calm when things feel overwhelming. Recovery isn’t perfect. There may be setbacks, doubts, or tough days. But using self-exclusion is a strong sign of self-awareness and commitment. It’s okay to ask for support and to take one day at a time.

Above all, self-exclusion is about creating space to feel safe again—mentally and financially. It’s about taking back control and allowing time for reflection and healing.

For those ready to take that step, help is available. Self-exclusion tools are free, easy to access, and they work best when combined with support from professionals, friends, and family.

Where to Find Support and Gambling Helplines in the UK

In the UK, there are many support services designed to help people take back control and move toward recovery.

One of the most accessible options is the National Gambling Helpline. This free, 24/7 service offers confidential support from trained advisers who understand what you’re going through. Whether you’re the gambler or someone affected by it, the helpline can help you talk through the problem, understand your options, and take action. You can call them on 0808 8020 133 or use the live chat feature on the Gambling Help Online website.

Beyond the helpline, there are local and national support groups that offer a space to connect with others who are facing the same challenges. These groups provide understanding and encouragement. Sharing your story with people who “get it” can help you feel less isolated and more motivated to change.

Professional organisations such as GamCare and NHS gambling clinics offer professional help through counselling and structured treatment plans. They are trained to deal with gambling-related harm, including emotional distress and financial problems.

If you’re not ready to speak to a service, consider talking to a friend, family member, or even a colleague. Opening up might feel difficult at first, but it’s often the first sign of strength. Honest conversations can lead to real support.

Remember: whether you’re looking for one-on-one therapy, group sessions, or just someone to listen to, help is out there.